the end of an era

First: happy birthday, Amy.

Everyone's going to say the same, but it's only because it's true--the waltz was so much fun. I find these recurrent themes in my life a little strange. I can easily say that the most memorable year of my soon-to-be twenty years was the year of Wizard of Oz, senior year of high school. And I was the yellow brick road! During that year the sense of possibility was so strong. As much as I hate to admit it, being here really can taint that feeling, no matter how hard you try not to get caught up in the day to day stress and to not be like the driven people who actually don't know what they are really striving towards. Even this year, when I suddenly had so many options, it felt like something rare--when shouldn't it be the norm? So it's interesting that this Oz theme resurfaces during a time when I feel like I've narrowed my choices, but for the better.

I think anyone who knows me knows that I tend to define my life too much in terms of these kinds of things--books I've read, movies I've seen, music I've listened to, TV shows I've followed. I don't really know what to say or do about that, except that it's true and probably always will be true. I've told people this before, but there's a class here called "Lives Ruined by Literature" and especially lately I feel like I would be a prime subject for it. I'm this generation's Emma Bovary, minus the drama of extramarital affairs (so, really, a less interesting version). I hope this doesn't remain the case forever. I know I just said it probably will, but I'm optimistic.

So the end of Friends was definitely the end of an era (as Rachel says when she moves out and Chandler moves in). I remember how my youngest brother and I watched it from the very beginning, and we two, who had nothing else in common or anything really to say to each other during those years, would watch it together every week. I remember when I bonded with my sixth grade crush over "Smelly Cat." I remember when Victoria and Melissa would not quit using the expression "Woopah!" I remember when Matthew Perry was at the top of my and Victo's fling lists. I remember when Emily dressed up as Chandler for Halloween. I remember conversations in physics about how Joey can make anything sound dirty. I wouldn't say I'm going to miss the show but it's interesting, the things that connect you to the people who haven't grown up with you but who have just grown up as the same time as you.

Besides all of the above, this song first reminds me of the time when Audrey drove Vicki and me to Vicki's house, after volunteering at San Jose Family Shelter. It was really dark because we'd been there all day and really quiet because we were all exhausted, and Aud played it while we drove up those ridiculously steep hills. That doesn't really have a point other than it's a nice memory.

And I'd like to end by saying that only my blockmates can be such Top Model material (that includes you, Peter).