young

As I sit up at night, trying to adjust again to a night schedule after a couple days off, I feel the hours differently than the day. Overall this month has stretched out very slowly, and it's made me think about time more. Even though the time feels longer, it feels less full since I'm mostly just working and sleeping. So I thought it would be a good time to write about thoughts I had when my life was more full. I remember feeling great after coming home from a short trip to Denver this past winter, when I went snowboarding in beautiful mountains with my brother, and telling M that it gave me a real sense of three things that keep me feeling young as the years past--

Movement. I think feeling the power of your body to move, especially as your body experiences changes as you get older and you start trusting it less, really does keep you feeling young. As I get older I find myself trusting my body more. I know it better but I've learned to adapt to its changes as I go along, and this combination makes for an exploration that keeps me learning more about what I can do. And it makes you feel both undifferentiated and developed--undifferentiated in that you can do anything you choose, and developed in pursuing different paths.

Nature. Being in diverse natural environments brings a freshness that can be stolen from our reserves as we sit working inside. It's one thing I am consistently grateful for, the opportunity to really be surrounded, immersed, and loved. The strength and kindness of landscapes mirrors everything I want. And I love them all. Deserts. Mountains. Oceans. Streams. Forests. Caves, valleys, canyons, volcanoes. Snow, blossoms, foliage, dry branches. There's just so much, and I think that what really keeps you young is the depth of wonder.

Doing new things. I think this is something I really appreciated when I learned to bike and swim, not just because these things are associated with youth and that's when normal people learn them, but because as an adult I could really appreciate how new the experience was. And it made me feel young, completely apart from the association. The sensation of experiencing something really different from what you've done before again brings you back to that sweet spot between being undifferentiated and developed, that sense of potential and achievement and boundaries still untouched.